Dire News

Recreation

Pulp Friction

by on Jun.09, 2015, under Consumer, Health, Recreation

A 19-year-old is missing from his camp site at the lookout in Heaton State Forest, which borders the Watagans National Park in Australia. The man, whose name has not been released, is from from Tenambit near Maitland. camper_missing He was last seen carrying a roll of toilet paper. kid_wrap While some searchers think he may have slipped and fallen, we wonder if there's not a more sinister explanation. tp_scott Toilet paper can humiliate and cause extreme pain. It's been alleged to be responsible for bullying and emotional distress. crybaby - 2 crybaby -3 crybaby - 4 crybaby - 5 crybaby - 6 crybaby - 7 crybaby - 8 crybaby - 9 If you go camping, protect yourself by using safe toilet paper.
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The Natural Spread

by on Apr.19, 2015, under Art, Family, Food, Kids, Media, Miscellaneous, Recreation

When you're in the kitchen, it's natural to want healthy alternatives. For a long time, the popularity of butter was unchallenged for its special qualities. butter01 It was wholesome and natural, just the kind of thing you'd want for your children. butter02 But there were concerns about whether butter had some unhealthy qualities and people began to experiment with alternative substances. boy_shavecream3 Crisco became the popular substitute and its place was enshrined in the jokes of many late night comedians. cris01 It had the right texture. cris03 And it was digestible, in case you just couldn't resist that lovely pie. Le-Marche-St-George-Thanksgiving014-Remodelista For few years Crisco remained popular, but eventually people realized that it had its own side-effects. dhtinkage01 You had to use it in moderation. It was shortening. new_crisco The new formulation of Crisco eliminates the trans fat, but after recent medical studies, butter is coming back into favor. lolbutter Butter is wholesome and natural. It's better with butter! better_with_butter
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Swing On A Scar

by on Feb.15, 2015, under Culture, Games, Recreation

The thrill that you get from achieving that goal, whether flying a plane, running a race, or shagging a sheep, diminishes every time you repeat the feat. The Piper Cub pilot might aspire to a Learjet, the 5K runner might take on a marathon, and sheep shagger wait stop why would anybody do that?! bungee1 You take the first leap of faith, and want to experience the same thrill, so you take it to greater heights. bungee2 After you've once again reached that plateau, you take it to the extreme. rbung5 The Moscow based Sinner Team has been practicing extreme stunts since 2008. Despite the extreme nature of their sports, they play it safe. Here a group member makes sure the bungee doesn't tangle as a colleague takes a 250 foot leap from the tower. rbung3 It's immediately noticeable when the end of the bungee is reached and it starts to stretch. rbung4 But there's no need to worry, when the harness is firmly attached to the body. rbung2 The Sinners prepare for their jumps by inserting four metal bars to which the harness will attach through skin piercings. The piercings are temporary, just for the occasion. rbung1 They jump and record their expressions as the harness tightens. rbung7 Then they land triumphantly. We wonder what they'll hang from when the thrill is over this time.
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“Dick” Shot

by on Feb.15, 2015, under Games, Health, Kids, Recreation, Toys, Weapons

Ex Vice-President Dick "Dick" Cheney started the trend. dickcheney_shotgun While on a hunting trip, he shot 78 year old Harry Whittington, a Bush-Cheney campaign donor from Austin, Texas. #shootafriendintheface The injuries from birdshot are visible on his face as Harry Whittington, the man accidentally shot a.. Whittington had a heart attack after a piece of buckshot migrated to a heart muscle, but most of the other wounds were superficial. A grateful Whittington later appeared on television to apologize for the incident.
whit_illus

Medical drawing of injuries to Harry Whittington

"My family and I are deeply sorry for all that Vice President Cheney and his family have had to go through this week," Whittington said. But it was too late to prevent the new fad of shooting a friend in the face. #shootafriendintheface Six year old Yang Yang was playing with his cousin in Neijiang, in southwest China's Sichuan Province, when thy came across a gun. Yang's cousin, also six years old, picked it up and shot him in the face. yangyang3 The boys returned to their house about ten minutes later, according to their grandmother, who said, “They were crying, and Yang Yang's face had a huge hole, bleeding profusely.” yangyang2 Doctors removed all 325 pellets from the blast. yangyang1 Yang's father said that both boys were terrified at what had happened. Like Whittington, Yang is expected to survive, though there will be substantial scarring. shotgun2 But he's lucky. Shotgun wounds to the face can be much more serious. shotgun_forensic And apologizing to Dick Cheney won't make it any better.
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Everything Is Awesome

by on Nov.01, 2014, under Art, Family, Kids, Parenting, Recreation, Toys

We showed some interesting costumes in What We Pretend To Be, and while they're nothing new, we saw a variety of Lego-themed costumes. lego-block01The basic Lego block and the generic Lego man used to be the mainstays of the Lego costume set. lego-costume02 But then Lego started licensing movies and games. You can even go to a Lego store and customize a Lego figure to look like you. lego-costume04 Now there are superheroes, like the members of the Justice League lego-costume05 Famous pop stars like The Village People lego-costume06 Whoever these guys are (we were afraid to ask) lego-costume07 Even if its a Lego zombie. lego-costume08 Some costumes take less effort than others. boba Caillen Sheppard loves Legos. He has an extensive collection including a large number of Star Wars pieces. The seven year old from Ontario wanted to be Lego Boba Fett, and his father, Keith Sheppard, 41, tackled the job with enthusiasm. lego-boba01 Much of the suit, which took about 100 hours to build, was made from Sintra, a rigid, lightweight PVC. Insulation foam board was used to make the dome shape of the helmet, and the rocket tips and exhausts were constructed from Plastazote, a closed cell foam. The graphics were cut from adhesive vinyl, applied over the paint, and then clear coated for durability. lego-boba05   The attention to detail, compared to the original Lego creation, is amazing. And like the Lego creation, the antenna and backpack are removable. lego-boba03 It's no surprise that the costume took first place at the Burlington Toycon, as Keith Sheppard is a graphics designer, a long-time star wars fan, and a great father. lego-boba04
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How to Use a Fork

by on Sep.07, 2014, under Health, Recreation

Life in Canberra, Australia sounds like it can be pretty interesting. can_bird If you live long enough, you might not have the same sense of excitement that you did when you were younger. can_wombat You might be inclined to try things that hadn't crossed your mind before. kanga_rut4 Coming to that place where the road runs off in two different directions, a 70 year old resident decided to try something out of the ordinary to achieve sexual gratification. After regretting it for 12 hours, the man finally went to the emergency department. can_fork He told doctors he had inserted the 10cm dinner fork into his urethra almost 12 hours earlier in an attempt to achieve sexual gratification. But the utensil became stuck. The fork was not visible but doctors were able to feel it from the outside and X-rays showed its position. Doctors considered several retrieval options before deciding to pull the fork free using forceps and copious lubrication while the patient was under a general anesthetic. The elderly patient was then sent home. It is not known whether he still has a complete set of dinnerware.  
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Cutting Corners

by on Aug.10, 2014, under Culture, Games, Recreation

The Tonghe County Stadium in northeastern China’s Heilongjiang province had been undergoing renovation, and was behind schedule. tonghe_stadium With time running out for finishing the 10,000 square foot stadium, and an impending inspection by provincial leaders and Communist Party officials, the project managers cut a few corners. tonghe_track3 The oval track had already been finished, except for the surface marking. Figuring out how to lay out concentric ovals requires math. tonghe_track1 So they laid out the track as a rectangle, with 90 degree corners. “In order to get it ready for the leaders, we painted it like that,” one of the stadium managers said. “We think it is ugly too but if the leaders don’t ask us to change it, what are we supposed to do?” tongue_track2 The innovative layout hasn't been popular with the public. “It’s impossible to run on such a surface,” said long distance runner Zhang Yong. He went on to  call the track a disgrace to the sport of running.
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Rolling Under

by on Aug.03, 2014, under Culture, Education, Games, Kids, Recreation

When it comes to skating under cars, a six year old has beaten all other contenders flat. gagan12 Gagan Satish, only six years old, is from Bangalore, India. He's become a celebrity in his own community, and is rapidly gaining fans around the world. gagan06 Gagan, who received his first pair of roller skates at the age of three, covered 230 feet in just 29 seconds. gagan11 What makes his accomplishment unique is that he skates close to the ground. gagan08 His face remains no more than five inches from the pavement. gagan07 That's how he performs his signature feat. gagan04 Gagan likes to skate under cars. gagan03 "I love skating," he said. "I have been doing it since I was three years old. My next goal is to skate underneath 100 cars. I also want to go to the Olympics." His record 29 second run took him under 37 cars. gagan02 His amazing flexibility allows him to do the splits and slide right under the chassis. gagan01 Gagan trains rigorously to keep up his skills. He starts the day at 5:00 AM and spends a few hours being coached before going off to school. gagan10 After school, he skates in the streets, spending a couple of hours on speed training and muscle flexibility before he goes into his limbo position. gagan09 Gagan has inspired some of his friends to take up limbo skating. His coach, Yatish Gowda, expressed great pride in his young student.    
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